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Ask the Golf Guzzler -- No. 50
I swung my pitching wedge over my bag in anger and accidently broke the shafts on my driver and 3 wood. I had my local Pro Golf replace the shafts. Should I have a concern of damage done to the club head with that kind of impact? Billy Wade
A: Assuming you mean the head of the pitching wedge, I wouldn't worry. It sounds to me like it will soon be at the bottom of a pond, anyway.
Dear Guzzler: How long does one beer stay in your system until it is out of your body?
A: My body? About 20 minutes. Maybe 15 if I shank one into the woods.
Dear Guzzler: I live in northern climes (Brooklyn) and need your input on keeping my fingers from freezing while holding a cold one in a golf cart zipping along at 35 or so degrees in the rough, searching for my wayward drive. Those bulky winter gloves suck. Any advice?
A: Sorry. No pain, no gain. We aren't bowlers.
Dear Guzzler: I have been practicing my golf swing at home in the garden. There I have been concentrating on swinging the club so that it would nicely slide on the surface of the grass. However when I went to the driving range the other day, all my balls flew high and nice but always to the right. I cannot figure out what the problem is. Please help.
A: Glad to help. Your problem is that you have grass in your garden. Try a hoe instead of a golf club.
Dear Guzzler: My brother is a long-time player and his game is very good, but all he needs to look like a newby is a single beer on the course. What can he do to beat this challenge?
A: A single beer is not enough. Give him more.
Dear Guzzler: After a marathon day of bad golf, my friend and I were ascending a steep hill on the 17th hole of our local course. The grass was very slipery and unfortunately we lost control of our cart and rolled it down the steep embankment. Empty Bud cans, balls, clubs, cart parts and bags were strewn about the fairway, along with my friend and I. It looked like a train wreck. Should I consider buying a helmet?
A: I am not a spiritual man, but there must be a reason why the Higher Power allowed you to live. Perhaps you will cure cancer. I don't see why you need a helmet for that.